Standing up in a Hammock

Have you ever tried this? I’m serious. Have you ever tried this? For some of us, just attempting to get into (and later, get out of) a hammock is tricky enough. But trying to actually stand up in one? Well, that’s one of those things that if your parents mother saw you attempting to do as a child, she probably thought you would fall and hit your head (hard on a sharp, pointy rock–of course), bleed all over the place, have to rush you to the hospital where they would discover you had caused brain damage and life would never be the same again. Plus you would have given her gray hair and taken 30 years off her life expectancy. Am I right?

Yeah…well, this feels like my life today. This week. Last year. I could go on.

But specifically yesterday and today.  My five (yes, five) kids and I got home from a family trip to Nebraska. Nebraska??? Yes, Nebraska. It was the Miss Czech-Slovak US Pageant and my daughter was a candidate. All in all, over 30 hours of driving time with no air-conditioning in 90+ degree weather.  So we return home Wednesday (I finished a rough draft and turned it in while on the road at a hotel with internet) and go to bed after attempting to find the cause of the horrible cat litter skank smell. It was bad. Like I can’t even describe it bad. I eventually found the source of the odor the next day–apparently, it’s more fun to pee on the rug by the door than in the litter box which is right beside the rug when you are mad at your humans for leaving you.

Thursday was a staff meeting (you know how those go!) and a peer-editing day. Friday was get the dog to the vet and groomer, get son to his job, do more peer-editing, realize that the vet hasn’t called you yet, leave messages at the vet because they are  now “closed”, run and get your son from work, and go to a wedding rehearsal day (I played piano).

Today, I cleaned (because boy did the house need it) and went to school to make my video without distractions. I then got home, took 10 minutes to shower (important), get dressed (very important), do my hair (not as important), give last minute instructions to the kids (definitely

important) and get out the house to the church on time (the bride thought that was important). Yes, you should be impressed that I can shower and get ready all in 10 minutes. It’s a life skill.

a-perfect-metaphor-for-my-life-would-be-someone-trying-27326872After that, I had to deal with a family issue which totally exhausted me.  Then my oldest child texts me about her emotionally charged changes. The one I knew was coming. The other…well let’s just say it was a surprise. Hey mom, I’m going to a different state to college next year! Wait! What!?!?! Yeah. Then I start to upload my video to YouTube. Should be a short and simple process. Nope. Not for me. Four hours and three e-mails to my professor later because it was going to get in AFTER the deadline…

Anyway…I could go on. But I think that’s enough. So umm, yeah…a perfect metaphor for my life is “someone trying to stand up in a  hammock”.

And from my Violet Vantage Point, this metaphor is not really that pretty. In fact, it’s a little bit scary. And very much real.


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